Introduction

The "Hotel Melanoma" moniker is a metaphor for living with my particular brand of cancer. Except for those lucky few of us deemed "cured", all we cancer survivors are guests of one of the many, many branded hotels in the "Hotel Carcinoma" chain. We can check out any time we like, but we can never leave. Meanwhile, let's be livin' it up; and please support cancer education, prevention, and treatment research.



Tutu Brothers

Monday, April 13, 2015

I Wanna Be Sedated

I don’t know about you, but there have been quite a few times during my extended stay at The Hotel Melanoma when I’ve had a strong desire for heavy sedation. Like all the times when I got the high fever shakes so bad during biochemotherapy treatments that kind nurses knocked me out with a nice shot of Demerol into my PICC line, thank you very much. And on the occasion of the first MRI scan of my brain when I took an accidental overdose of Ativan to counter my extreme claustrophobia—a mistake my dear wife will likely never forget or completely forgive. And last, but not least, during the seemingly interminable waits to receive scan results or pathology reports.

With gratitude that I’ve no need of pharmaceutical assistance to get me through this lovely spring day in the Rockies, I’ll sign off with The Hotel Melanoma Rendition of “I Wanna Be Sedated” from The Ramones…



Plenty plenty plenty more hours to go
I wanna be sedated
Nothing to do, nowhere to go oh,
I wanna be sedated

Just get me doctor’s report, ease my worried strain
Hurry hurry hurry, before I go insane
I can't control my rigors, I can't control my pain
Oh no oh oh oh oh

Plenty plenty plenty more hours to go
I wanna be sedated
Nothing to do, nowhere to go oh,
I wanna be sedated

Just put me in a wheelchair, find the friggin’ vein
Hurry hurry hurry, before I go insane
I can't control my rigors, I can't control my brain
Oh no oh oh oh oh

Plenty plenty plenty more hours to go
I wanna be sedated
Nothing to do, nowhere to go oh,
I wanna be sedated

Just put me in a wheelchair, get me through the slow
Hurry hurry hurry, before I go loco
I can't control my rigors, I can't control my glows
Oh no oh oh oh oh

Plenty plenty plenty more hours to go
I wanna be sedated
Nothing to do, nowhere to go oh,
I wanna be sedated

Just put me in a wheelchair, get me through the slow
Hurry hurry hurry, before I go loco
I can't control my rigors, I can't control my glows
Oh no oh oh oh oh

Ba ba baba, baba ba baba, I wanna be sedated
Ba ba baba, baba ba baba, I wanna be sedated
Ba ba baba, baba ba baba, I wanna be sedated
Ba ba baba, baba ba baba, I wanna be sedated

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